Also, Daylight Savings Time Is On

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

recently my life seems to be a neverending cycle of school, homework, anime and sleep. oh, and eating. sometimes more than one at a time, and there's really a sense of... um... whatever the opposite of fulfillment is. basically i'm bored out of my very-limited-yet-still-overtaxed brains. um. brain. (oh, how i wish i had more than one...)

so i decided i should blog, and maybe in so doing, build up enough of a head of steam to address gan's writing challenge, which for me is currently two rather well-written (imo) paragraphs which have absolutely no plot whatsoever. meh.

so. i skipped school today. but that's not as significant as the fact that i actually completed TWO homework assignments today! heh.. unfortunately the only reason i have to do such a crazy thing (right up there with skydiving) is because i have a crazy amount of shit to do over the next 2 weeks, including 1 exam, 1 programming project, 1 lab report that's 5% of my entire grade (could be more) and there's still the 16 hours of community service i need to clock to elect into HKN. MEH.

i also skipped aikido today. #&#$!$!@#!$. i have definitely skipped more aikido than i really should. i mean, the new guy has more lesson this term than i have the entire last year. yeah.

let's see. today i also created some really weird shit out of taiwan sausages, chicken cubes, soup base, mushrooms and ramen. which didn't taste as bad as i thought it would have, although i'm never going to put taiwan sausages in my noodles again. EVAR. on the bright side, i'm starting to like the idea of one-pot meals. and i can flip an egg without a spatula! *beams*

okay whatever, i'm going to back to watching Azumanga Daioh. =D

Memory

Monday, March 03, 2008

i've been thinking about memory these few days. i read somewhere that memory is "a tricky thing. it's not linear. you reassemble the fragments every time and 'reconstruct' the past". and i don't know if that's true but it sure sounds right to me.

see, there's this memory in my mind that i'm not sure if its a memory or not. i have this distinct memory of my dad bringing me to a dairy farm, way back when i could count my age on one hand (and now i can't count my age with ALL my limbs. geez i'm old.) but the thing is, my dad doesn't really remember if he ever did that. and i'm not that sure if it ever happened. which means this 'memory' of mine could be nothing more than a particularly vivid dream. it's kinda weird. also sort of intriguing. i mean, some things i remember: i remember crying my eyes out the first day at preschool. i remember my primary school principal addressing my batch. i remember all that, and those memories have a distinct sense of reality to them. i know they're real. but some things? not so much.

and i think about her and those few weeks and i realise that almost no one else knows anything about it, and i think about how weird, how different our subsequent relationship has been as compared to my (few) other breakups and i can almost, almost, make myself believe that those few weeks never happened, that it was all a dream, because no one else knows, and she doesn't seem to acknowledge it, so it seems like i'm the only person in the world still validating its existence. and if i simply.... stop?

if i just stop, who else is left to say that it was real and not just a dream?